The Shelter of the Most High!

What better place to be than in the shelter of the Most High. When I think of that statement "the shelter of the Most High", I think of being totally and completely protected, covered and sheltered from every storm, every trial. Then my thoughts turn to thinking that I won't have to endure any of the pain and anguish that might come along from them, I think of being held and carried, protected from any pain that might accompany them and definitely never alone. Somewhere along the way, my thoughts have turned to myself and thinking about me and what I can get from the "shelter". How can I be cared for, etc.? But is that what life is really all about? Is this what it truly means to be in "The Shelter of The Most High"? I have found that my thinking starts out right, but then satan gets in there and does his twist on things and gets everything all topsy turvy. Then before I know it, my thoughts are pretty "fleshy" thoughts.

I am a pretty strong person, well I like to think I am and most people who know me will tell you the same. I often wonder about those people who say that, are they giving me a compliment or are they critizing me? Is that a positive thing or a negative thing? I had someone tell me once (about 15 years ago), "...when you walk into a room, people see a person with lots of strength, someone who has it all together, someone who has goals and desires and knows how to reach them, but what they don't see is that you are falling apart on the inside". His comment was kind of like the phrase many of us have heard at some point in our lives, "never let them see you sweat". Well, I am truly that kind of person. I don't want anyone to know of my struggles or trials because the flesh part of me thinks they will believe that I am a wimpy, weak person. Sounds like my "fleshy" thoughts that I mentioned above were driving my life. But as I am getting older and learning that I am not as strong as I thought I was, nor do I want to be, I am realizing that my true shelter does not come from me being strong or even giving the appearance of being strong, it comes from the Shelter of the Most High.

I have begun sharing my deepest struggles with those who are closest to me. I am learning that others have the same struggles. It is sad and refreshing at the same time. Here we are running around thinking that we are going through all these struggles and no one has any idea what we are going through, but the truth is, WE ARE ALL GOING THROUGH THE SAME THING. Sure our struggles are different and some of us have more struggles than others, but we are all struggling. It only makes sense that we would lean on one another and share with one another in order to allow God to work through us to reach others. But you see, our pride gets in the way....if we admit that we have struggles or that we need help or that we are "falling apart on the inside", then people might think that we are less than we are. Not true!!! That is what satan wants us to believe. People who are truly walking with the Lord and have His spirit will not think we are less than we are, they will love us and care for us and they will be a shelter for us. These people that come to our aid when we are struggling, they are the ones that God is living through, they are someone tangible that God has placed in our midst so we can feel the Shelter of the Most High...through them.

I am living in the Shelter of the Most High and my prayer is that by sharing my struggles and victories with others, maybe they too will come to rest under the shelter of the Most High!

Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. Ps. 1:1

A Clean Slate!

Do you ever wish that you could turn back time, or go back and do something different? Maybe do things different with your children when they were little. Or maybe you wish that you could go back to your young adult years and get that degree from college that you always wanted but never pursued. Maybe you are still a young adult and are not getting that degree that you always wanted but feel it is too late to start now because everyone is younger and you would be starting late. Ever wish that you could change the outcome of a friendship gone bad because of a misunderstanding? Or wish that you could have handled a situation differently and not let your emotions drive you? Ever wonder what it would be like to just sit back and say, "ok God, I have gotten myself into this situation and now I am asking You to lead, guide and direct my every word and action, because I don't know how to do it" and then let Him do it, really? Do you think God would do it? If you really meant it and allowed Him to, He would. Our problem is that we start out with good intentions of surrendering everything to Him and when we get into it and things aren't going the way we think they ought to, we snatch them back and start with our own ideas, words, actions, etc. This is where we mess up. This is our downfall, or least it is my downfall. I have very good intentions of surrendering everything to Him and right smack dab in the middle of what I just prayed for, I snatch it all back from Him and decide to do it "my way".



The other day, someone in our organization asked me for some information. Information that only I could give because it was personal to my position here on the field. I put the information in email form and sent it on to this person. Some of the information was regarding my position on the field and what I see as my duties here. Basically, I told the person what I see as my duties and then proceeded to tell them that I didn't think the home office had any intention of me doing some of these things that I desire to do (yet, previously I had been told face to face that I would be doing these things). The person responded with an email not too long after I sent mine saying "it seems that you have gotten back into your old thinking". WHAM!!! Wake up call ! Well, I got called on my stuff and I am grateful for it. This is how easily we slip back into our old ways. I didn't even realize that I was allowing satan to drive my thinking and I was not relying on the Lord for my guidance. We all need friends like this who will call us on our stuff and we need to be the kind of friend who will call others on their stuff. In Jude, starting in verse 20 it says, "But you, dear friends, must build each other up in your most holy faith, pray in the power of the Holy Spirit and await the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ, who will bring you eternal life. In this way, you will keep yourselves safe in God's love. And you must show mercy to those whose faith is wavering. Rescue others by snatching them from the flames of judgement". This is what my friend did for me, he rescued me from my old thinking. That is showing God's love. This person allowed God's love to flow through him and spill out into my life.

I believe that the last year has been an opportunity for me to have my slate cleaned, an opportunity to start over in many areas of my life. This is an opportunity that we don't often get in life. We can't go back and change things that we did in our lives as young parents or how we might have handled a misunderstanding with a friend from years ago, but we can start today with a clean slate. We have a clean slate with God every moment. He offers us grace and peace and forgiveness and asks us to allow Him to be our guide and at the moment that we allow Him in to do that, our slate is cleaned. Even if we allow Him in and then take it right back, He is willing to do it over and over again. That is how much He loves us. Have you ever had someone do something to wrong you? something that was hurtful or deceitful? I have and I think we probably all have. If they came to you and said, "I messed up and I am sorry, I need your forgiveness", would you forgive them, would you allow them back into your life? Probably the first time they did this you would, but after two or three times, you would quit allowing them back into your life. But God is not like that. We do things every day that hurt Him, things that are not right. We say and do things that are not Godly to ourselves and to others. This is hurtful to God, it breaks His heart to see and hear us do and say such things to ourselves and to others. However, God lets us continue to come back and is always willing to wipe the slate clean and start again. No matter how many times we take it back, we can always go back to Father God and say, okay I am ready for you to be the leader of my life, and He will.



Allowing Him to navigate and show me the way has been a "process" for me. It probably is for most people. It is a constant surrendering of whatever is going on in my life at any particular moment. Some days I can go most of the day and not snatch it back from Him, but most days, I have to surrender a million times over and over to Him. And you know what just amazes me so much, each time I surrender, my slate is clean. He starts fresh with me, loving me unconditionally, guiding me and directing me with no guilt or condemnation. He is beside me and faithful to complete the good work that He has started in me.

Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into His glorious presence without a single fault. All glory to Him who alone is God, our Savior through Jesus Christ our Lord. All glory, majesty, power, and authority are His before all time, and in the present, and beyond all time! Amen! Jude vs. 24-25

Signed, Sealed and Soon to be Delivered!

I mentioned in an earlier post of the adjustment of coming back to the field after being stateside. I want to expound on that a bit this morning. Here in Haiti, there is definitely an atmosphere of the "Island Life". There is so much to do and people move at a snails pace. The pace of life in the USA is so much faster and as a result, many more things are accomplished in a day. Well, adjusting to this "island life" feel is somewhat stressful at times. You might think it is like being on vacation, and it is for a while, but as life takes shape and you develop your daily routines, it is not like a vacation at all. I am not even back working in my normal job yet and am already somewhat frustrated with the things that this little island brings in its lacksidaisical mood. I will adjust, I usually do, but it does take time.

In my bible study this morning, I was reading how the Spirit seals us. Then I started thinking, what does "sealed" really mean? We seal a jar to keep mango jelly fresh, we seal envelopes when we mail a letter to protect it's contents until it arrives at the destination, we seal a tupperware container when putting it in the refridgerator so the food will stay fresh. Sometimes we shake hands with someone when we agree on something, this is another form of sealing. Christ tomb was sealed. I turned to my bible to see what I could find on "sealing". In Eph. 1:13, it says, "Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit". It goes on to say later in Eph. 4:30 "Remember, he has identified you as His own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption". This seal that we have from God is the seal of the Holy Spirit. In Romans, it talks about how the Spirit joins himself with our spirits to say we are God's Children. This is our guarantee that we are not alone. The Holy Spirit is right with us all the time. Sometimes, I know that the Spirit is with me. I have a spring in my step and I feel secure and safe...even when I make a mistake or something bad happens, I am sure that the Spirit is with me. However there are other times when I don't feel so sure....

In my frustrations of getting used to Island Life again, I have sometimes felt very alone, even though I know that God is with me and I am certain of His love for me and do not doubt that. In Romans chapter 5 it talks about the hope we have in Christ. In 5:5 it says, "And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with His love". We belong to the Father. Signed, sealed and soon to be delivered. Here is the seal again. But the feeling of aloneness still creeps in at times and if you are like me, I don't even know what to say in my prayers. But let me share with you what it says in Romans 8:26-27, "And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don't know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groaning that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God's own will. WOW!!! I haven't ever been to court for anything, but I can imagine what it would be like to have someone up there pleading for my case. Someone saying the words that I can't seem to come up with. Someone standing up for me when I am being accused and don't know what to say or do. Someone speaking the desires of my heart when I am not even sure what they are. The Holy Spirit does our praying for us, making sense out of our prayer to God. When we mumble and stumble all over our words not knowing what to say or what is really in our hearts, much less how to get it out, the Holy Spirit does it for us. He is connected to our spirit and knows our deepest desires. This is just amazing to me. Talk about a seal. This is an incredible seal and guarantee that we are not alone. We have someone standing with us all the time, protecting us, fighting for us, an advocate for us. Someone who knows our needs even when we are adjusting to the island life and don't even know what those needs are
Now that is just AWESOME!

Doing My Part!

Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future. There is one Lord, one faith, one baptism, and one God and Father, who is over all and in all and living through all....Eph. 4:2-6

...then we will no longer be immature like children. We won't be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love. Eph.4:14-16

I pray that I will do my part today!

What Kind Of Fuel Are You Running On?

I was reading in a Max Lucado book this morning called "Come Thirsty". I have read this book probably a dozen times and everytime I read it I find something that wasn't in there before. It just amazes me that we see things when God is ready for us to see them.

The story in "Come Thirsty" was about people who are saved, yet spiritually unsaved. What that means is they accept the free gift of Christ Jesus, but then they take over and are trying to do life on their own strength.

I am the kind of person who likes to make things fit together, find solutions, look for the missing part or piece. I am a problem solver, that is one of my greatest strengths. If there is something that needs to be taken care of, I am right in there with ideas and suggestions to make it right. Sometimes, I don't even look at all aspects before I start trying to find a solution. I am often so confident that I have the answer, I don't even listen to other peoples suggestions. Then I come across as a "know it all". UGH!!! This is one thing about myself that I really don't like. This is where satan knows that he can "get me".

Here is where I go wrong, I forget that the ability to solve problems is a gift that God gave me and the only fuel that it will run well on is the fuel that I receive from Him.

In Galations 3:3 it says: "How foolish can you be? After starting your Christian lives in the Spirit, why are you now trying to become perfect by your own human effort?

Living The New Life!

Sometimes I wake up and start my journaling and prayer time and I feel all out of things to say. Often, I feel almost guilty about asking for certain things or wanting Father God to fulfill a desire that I have because there are many people who have many more struggles than I could ever imagine. I think about all the people that I have known who have or have had cancer, who have lost children or a spouse or both. People who have lost their jobs and haven't worked in months or even years. Those who struggle to put food on the table and their hearts break because they have to tell their children no they can't play on the basketball team or they can't try out for cheerleading because there isn't money for those things. I sometimes feel guilty because I have so much. No, we aren't rich by any means, not even close, and there are many months when we wonder how we are going to make it until the next payday. However, we do have food on the table every day, clothes on our backs, and shoes to wear. We don't have alot of "extras", but we have enough and my kids get to do some fun stuff too. I have to tell them no many times because there just aren't funds to cover the amount of activity they would do or the things they would buy if we allowed them. But wouldn't we all do that? If we had an unending supply of money, wouldn't we do all the things that we desired? I have never had money to blow, but I can imagine that I would probably not do too well if I did. Teaching our children to understand that we need to be good managers of the money that God has given us is something that is not always easy for them to understand.
Well, back to this morning. I didn't even know where to start in my journaling, prayer time or much less where to read in my bible. I did my journaling more as routine than a time of being with the Father, which is very unusual for me. Towards the end of my time alone with him I asked him to speak to me what He wants me to hear. Somehow I was drawn to Colossians chapter 3. It just amazes me how God will speak to us if we just take the time to listen and follow. In my bible the title at the beginning of chapter 3 in Colossians is "Living the New Life". As I started reading these verses, I realized that I often focus only on the things of this earth. Like this morning, my prayers were for protection for my children, the two here in Haiti and the two that are back in the states . Protection for my husband (crazy man is out sailing in the ocean for 2 days). Prayer for my older daughter as she is still struggling with her tonsils and allergies. Asking for the heat & humidity to not be so bad. And then I realized that my prayers were very shallow. Don't get me wrong, I believe that Father God wants us to share our concerns and desires, but He also wants us to focus on what He has for us, not here on this earth, but the promises of our life with Him. We are new creations in Christ, we have been raised to new life with Him and our sights are to be set on the realities of Heaven not on the struggles of this earthly life. Instead of begrudging the troubles this earthly life brings us, maybe we ought to listen to them. Allow our struggles to remind us that our days here are only temporary. Use these trials to remind us that peace is coming...complete and unending peace. This life on earth is only for a time.
In Colossians 3, it goes on to say that we are to put on our new nature, and be renewed as we learn to know our Creator and become like HIM! And then He tells us exactly what to do starting in verse 12; "Since God chose you to be the holy people He loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Make allowance for each other's faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
He goes on with more instruction and I encourage you to go and read all of Colossians chapter 3. There is alot of hope in there and when we are struggling through our trouble's in this life, this passage might help you have a new perspective on the things of the day. It did me!
Everyday, no matter what it holds, is a day that carries us closer to the day our Father will come.

I Want To Be Weak Today!

I just started a study on David yesterday. I have had the book for about 2 years, but never found the time to open it up. I am glad that I am doing it now.
During my time this morning and in my study of David, I reflected on my life and the events of it. It seems as though my life has been a series of events that one would think would make me lean on Him for my strength, that has not been the case. In my life I have always been strong willed, strong minded, physically strong, strong in my beliefs and any other way that one can be strong. I am finding though that my strength is just not enough. It seems the stronger I get, the weaker I am. I am finding as I grow weaker in these areas, that is where true strength is, that is where God is. This doesn't mean that I get rid of who I am, who God made me to be, however it does mean that I allow Him to be my strength. I am allowing God to guide and steer me and sometimes things don't work out like I thought they would or even should, but this life is not about me is it? It is all about HIM!
God prepared my life ahead of time. He prepared yours ahead of time too. Before we were born, God knew exactly what he was going to do with our lives. When we are little children, we are guided and protected by our parents. Their job is to teach us to basically care for our selves on a daily basis. They are to teach us basic morals & values and guide us to the Father who will show us the way as we become teens and young adults. Unfortunately, because of sin, that often doesn't happen and we end up building our lives on our own strength, struggling the best we can to make life work for us. Even if our parents did a fantastic job, our focus ends up being survival, struggling to get what we want or need. Maybe it is to be successful in a career, or to even be a good mom or dad. It could be trying to figure out how to pay the bills and put food on the table this month. Sometimes it means just figuring out how to make it through the day without giving up completely, I think we have all been there at one point in our lives. We end up putting on what I call "boots of strength". These boots are created by each of us throughout our lives and as our needs change we reshape them to "fit" us and meet our needs. But God has a different plan for us! Remember, He prepared our life ahead of time and we often disregard what He has for us. We just put our "boots" on every morning and go about our day. What about the life He prepared for us? Do we just disregard it and go about fulfilling our own needs and wants? Is that what God planned? I don't think so!
I encourage you to take off those "boots of strength" that are heavy and uncomfortable, they weigh you down and keep you in your "stuff". These boots were created with our own personal strength and they really aren't as steady, stable and strong as we would like to think they are. Surrender to Father God, grow weak in your own strength so you can enjoy and rest in HIS STRENGTH! You can't have both. If we are strong in our own strength then Christ can't live through us because we try to take over. Put on the "SHOES CREATED IN CHRIST JESUS". They are easy to wear and they feel really good. At first, it feels wimpy and weak, but after you do it a few times it gets easier and easier. Then you come to the point that it is something you long for, a desire to be weaker and weaker so Christ can become stronger and stronger through you.
Be "weak" today so Christ can be "STRONG" in your life.

Rolling Thunder and Hot, Big Dog Breath!

Upon returning to the field, I made a commitment to myself and to God that I would have a time of prayer and reading of His word on a daily basis. Even if I could only spend 15 minutes, I decided that I had to do this. I had been doing it stateside, but sporadically towards the end of our time there. So, I set big goals for myself and amazingly I have stuck to them.
I have never been a morning person, in fact I would be the one that sleeps until 10am and then stays up til midnight. However, I am finding that my favorite time of the day is from 5am to 7am. I long for the morning time when I can get back in His word and saturate my mind and heart with the knowledge, wisdom and grace that God has for us.
This morning I awoke at 3:30 to loud, rolling thunder. It was pouring raining outside, hard rain and lots of it. The thunder was so big, I do not think I have ever heard thunder like that. Our youngest, who is almost ten was promptly in the bed with us and our "middle" dog (she is in between the other two dogs in age), who is a 60lb chocolate lab and the biggest chicken of them all, was whining to come in too. I brought her in and got her settled on the floor beside the bed. But she would not lay down, she insisted on putting her face right up to mine as I tried to go back to sleep. She had hot, big dog breath, and she would not leave me alone. I had to at least touch her with my hand. She wanted someone to comfort her, she was scared. Once everyone was settled again it was almost 4am. The thunder was still rolling and the storm was not letting up at all. I decided that this might be the best sleep of the night, so I curled up and tried to drift off, with one hand resting on the dogs head.
Not a chance, each time I began to drift off again, the thunder would clap again and the whole process started over with the dog. She would breathe hot, big dog breath in my face again and whine. So, we layed there for about an hour repeating this process of drifting off, thunder clapping, hot, big dog breath and whining. Finally at 5am when my alarm went off, I got up and put the dog outside. The rain had let up, but the thunder was still rolling. It was incredible to hear. The dog didn't last long outside, she wanted to be right beside me. So I brought her into my office and made her lay down beside me while I had my time with the Lord. She was such a nuisance, she insisted on me touching her in some way. She wanted to know that I was there. I started to get irritated, but then I realized, isn't this what God wants from us? He wants us to run to Him and have a desire to be right beside Him, to be totally in His presence? When we are scared, it is easy to run to the Lord, just like our 10 year old ran to us and our dog came scampering into the safety and shelter of her "master". But when we are not scared and life is rolling along without big thunder claps, Father God desires us to still be close to Him. Why do we often just run to Him in times of distress? It is an awesome place to be, in the presence of the Father. I know that my God would not get irritated with me for coming to Him as I got irritated with my dog for wanting me to touch her. He always welcomes me with open, loving arms and covers me with His grace and love. God desires us to treat one another in the same way. Sometimes, friends, co-workers, neighbors, etc. come to us and we put them off. We are too busy or too caught up in what is going on in our lives to even notice that they might be seeking shelter or an ear to hear or just a friend to love them along the way. Maybe they need a hug and they don't even know it.
I encourage you to allow God to live through you today. Notice those around you who might need a little shelter, a hug or an ear to listen to them. They might just need to know that there is someone out there who cares for them and to be reassured that they are important and they count and make a difference. Most likely, these people who are looking for this shelter, don't even realize that they are seeking something. Open your eyes and look around you, close your mouth and really listen to what others are saying. You might be surprised what you see and hear.

Steady in the shelter of His arms!

Good Morning Father God,
It is so awesome to be in Your presence. I long for You when I get bogged down in my stuff, but it seems I can't even catch my breath to call out to You. But I know that You are here with me, even when I can't call out Your name, even when I am too hard headed to call out for You. You are always here. You speak to me in so many ways. Sometime I hear You and acknowledge You and sometimes I ignore You; still depending on my self for peace and security. And then there are other times that I am so far away I don't even hear You calling me. And in all of this, Father God, You are still here, still faithful even when I am not.
I pray Father that You will show me how to call out to You boldly at the first sign of me drifting too far from Your presence. That I will use my voice to reach out to You first in all things not just when things don't go right or I am stressed. Teach me Father how to lean on You when I think I am strong, how to come to You when I am thirsty. How to drink from Your cup and not turn to the things of this world for security.
And Father, I pray for the voice that You have put inside me to be used. Used in the way You desire, used to Glorify YOU!!!
I love you Father God!

Everything Is Still The Same, But One Thing is Different!

Well, just when I think I have it all together and things are going pretty smoothly, the bottom falls out. I don't know why, but I seem to keep doing the same things over and over again expecting different results. I know that the moment I let my guard down, satan is going to squirm his way back into my plans, thoughts, actions, etc. He did just that.
I knew that returning to the field would be a big adjustment after being stateside for 9 months. I also knew that I have have been through alot of training and my perspective is different than when I left the field back in October. However, I keep forgetting that the field is still the same. Everything looks the same, certain rules and regulations are still the same and people act the same. I knew this before returning and even talked about it with friends, coworkers, leaders in the faith and others, but somehow it has hit me in the face as though I didn't think about it. I am really glad that I talked with others about it before returning. It seems that when we learn something we just expect that others have learned the same thing, at least that is what I do.
My idea of returning to the field was that even though it would be an adjustment, it would be something that I could accomplish without much heartache or stress. God has shown me different. The heartache of life is still here, the same stresses are still here and life on the mission field is just plain hard. But the one thing that is different is I am drawn to the Lord for my strength now. I know that my time on this earth, whether on the foreign mission field or on the mission field in the USA, is time that must be focused on our Father God. Honoring God with my life, this is my purpose on this earth. If I honor God, He will honor me. I pray that my brothers and sisters in Christ can find strength in honoring God in our lives each and every moment. I pray that you all will focus on our Father God and know that He chose all of us to bear His Image!
May you be blessed and may you bless someone along the way!